matahari ku !

Horoscope for April 24, 2008.

Do you want to take things to a deeper level in your life? Instead of having a job, do you want to have a career? Instead of having a romantic relationship, do you want to be married? Instead of renting a home, do you want to buy one? These goals are good, they are healthy, and best of all -- they are attainable. You need to understand that. To reach them, take baby steps. You can't get to where you want to go all at once. Understand that things take time, and you will get there.

sure i do! :)

I feel a lot better now. Thanks so much for those being there for me when i need a shoulder to cry on. Thanks to mama and klang for their support. Right now, i feel so glad to know who's really being my friend and care for me. I 'm looking for someone who can share, someone who can take care of me, someone love me for who i am, from inside. I don't ask too much because that is all i wanted. Dream isn't just dream, and i wanna make it real. yeah, for u guys, mama and ayah and myself. i promise. :)

love ya!

will he ever know . .

Song that stuck in my head right now,

Tell Him - Celine Dion ft. Barbara Streisand


I'm scared
So afraid to show I care
Will he think me weak
If I tremble when I speak
Oooh - what if
There's another one he's thinking of
Maybe he's in love
I'd feel like a fool
Life can be so cruel
I don't know what to do

......


taken from Let's Talk About Love (1997)

tell him .

Reminiscing.

Ystrday incident still running on my mind.. but it's all happenned. i can't turn back and pretend everything is fine. the harder i try, the deeper i sink. i am.. i was pretend everything is fine in front. i thought i was patient enough to wait, with hope he will be with me someday.. i lied, i cried, and i blame myself for what had happen between us. he convinced me, he pleased me, he made me believed that someday, we will make it worth, we will have all the time in the world. honestly DD, i don't mind to wait. but look at u.. have u even wake up from sleep? u knw y i was upset with u? i upset because i care, because i love.. u've been hurt before, u told me u had enough of her. i was pleased to hear that he have made his final decision of letting her go.. i was happy for the fact, he won't be hurt anymore by the same person over and over again. i just wanna see him happy. eventhough he's not mine, but he's important to me, he's someone to me.

Ystrday may be the peak of all. it's hurt, really.. yea maybe i just can't understand him.. i've tried, i do.. but i failed.. and i gv up.. like i said, the harder i try, the deeper i sink. it's not about envy, it's not about jealousy of those girls that u told me.. but did't they made u feel bad and hurt before? u told me u were trying to get rid of them, did u? but now, u tell me that u were confused, u are between of two. i was.. only god knows how i feel.. i just break down, i can't even think well ystrday. i was disappointed but i really don't mean to hurt u. i know u were hurt. i'm so sorry.. i was, i just can't keep it inside anymore.. sometimes we need to be certain with our heart.. we can clear up all the doubts and confusion if we really want it. after all, it's all keep coming back to us. no one's is perfect, but at least we need to be certain of how we want it to be.

I hope u will be fine and happy in everythng u do.. i'll be proud to hear ur music, to see u on show. i believe in ur talent and ur music and i knw u can go further. u taught me to be strong and believe in myself.. thanks.. i'll never forget you..


say hi to teddy, i'll be missing you.

he's now doing his solo and group album. i wish him all the best. i had a great moment with him. cheers.

aw Pokka again?

oh yea, i need my Pokka lagi dan lagi..

i can feel the tensed and the heaatt of the final exm right now.. though org kate it's still early, i need to prepare for it earlier.. 12th May is my final! agak takut, but actly sgt takut. i need to increase my pointer back. adoi~ hm, tekad. that's it, i have to tekad. i need to do something with myself. fix myself. forget everything else. yea. i have to. gotta defreg and clean up my mind storage from all the spam and excess data to improve my performance. aha spam? yea, there's a lot of spam inside here.. spam yg sgt tak diperlukan, hanya memberatkan otak saya. oh i need some anti-virus too, to eliminate the virus that nearly kill and effect my overall inner system. what else? bnyk lagi yg kene tukar utk improve system computer otak saye. :)


i wish a balanced life, love and laugh. no one wish to be sadder. the happiest moment in one's life is to love and being loved by someone else. give us the courage to move on, to live this life no matter how hard it is. who's perfect? expect me to be one? forever i won't be, cause nobody does. everyone made mistakes, so do i. and so do you. but mistakes will always be a mistake if you do not try to improve it, if you don't try to change it for good. it's hard, i know. but it's for ourself, for our own happiness. i believe that life's perfect when happiness is there, no matter what you do. believe in ourself.

emotions running high .

been bz dis few weeks with midterms and assgmnts. uhh! stress. 1 assgmnt submisssion dis wed, 1 report submission and lab tmrw. : wish i could have a getaway, going somewhere and rest. i just miss the smell of ocean, the breeze, the sands and sunset.
i'm listening to, is it you by cassie. bosan plk mlm ni.. i should be doing my report by now, tp ntah.. i can't concentrate. too much on my mind. something stupid. yea i know.. but that something stupid made u crazy and unwell. ah abaikan. i wanna be someone. somewhere, and some time, i will make it real. i believe in chances. so i won't gv up.

"whatever the mind can dream, conceive, and believe, you will definitely achieve."


yes, i will. :)

was it all that easy ?

>> 28/3, 9.30pm .

To Love Again.

See i was the verge of breaking down,
I was shadowed with the things i cannot do,
Sometimes i'm hopeless,
I'm just break down and cry..
Started to lose my faith,
Didn't know where i should turn to..

Is it wrong for me to be true?
As i can see the things others don't see in you.
So baby don't hate me and push me aside,
Cos i can't take it for too long.

* i guess this is the way of living,
love keep come and go,
without you even know,
i gotta stand up again and smile,
knowing that there's no dark will last forever,
i realize there's still tomorrow,
sun will finally shine,
and i will love again.

What i feel now is just pain inside,
All alone without you beside
I wish u didn't go but i can't hold u down,
It's not right.
I have to leave you behind,
Left behind without no one else to blame.

Tell me was it all easy to just put aside your feeling?
Close your eyes for something you don't wanna see,
But how could you close your heart for something you don't wanna feel..
That's love, and it's hurt ..

Zawani Zakaria

Are you awake?

Awake .



i watched this movie last weekend and it was awesome! i should say this is the best movie i've seen. the story line is smooth and completely far from boring. the ending is really unexpected. for me, this movie really worth to watch despite make us think about every risk of life and love, the trust u put on someone, and of our mother's everlasting care and love. u will feel the emotion from the beginning of this movie. Jessica Alba as Sam was so sweet, and a caring girlfriend who take care of her boyfriend so well. but at the same time, she was the real evil in this story, and ruin all the hope and dreams of a lovely guy. Why? find out urself. hehe.